One
What was said
The words that actually came out. Barney starts here because it is the only part both people agree on.
Most arguments are not about what was said
They are about the gap between what was said, what was meant, and what was heard. Barney gives two people a way to walk through that gap together, instead of guessing at it.
Coming soon to iOS and Android
Two
What you meant
The thing behind the words. Often it never made it into the sentence at all.
Three
What they heard
Not always what you said, and rarely what you meant. Seeing it written down is usually the moment something shifts.
What Barney does
Translation
When something lands badly, take it apart together. Barney lays out the gap between intent and impact, then suggests a repair you can edit, use, or ignore.
Navigate
Before a hard conversation, prepare for it. Name the topic, say what tends to set you off and what you need in order to stay present, and get a way to open and a way to pause.
Warm Words
When saying it out loud is too much, send it in writing. Appreciation, encouragement, an apology, or simply letting someone know they matter.
Insights
See how your conversations are going over time, so progress is visible rather than something you have to take on faith.
It asks how you communicate, not what you are called
You tick the patterns that affect you. There is no diagnosis field, and you do not need a diagnosis to use it.
- I take things literally
- I need processing time before I respond
- I go quiet or shut down under stress
- I read a lot into tone and wording
- I need a heads-up before big topics
There are fourteen to choose from, and you can add your own in your own words.
You choose what each person sees
Disclosure is set separately for every person you connect with. Your co-parent does not need to know what your partner knows, and nothing is shared by default.
Barney works between two people at a time. You can connect as partners, co-parents, a parent and child, wider family, or friends, and the suggestions change to match.
What happens to what you write
- Your conversations are private to you and the person you shared them with. Nobody else reads them.
- Stored in Germany, inside the EEA, on servers we control.
- No analytics, no crash reporting, no tracking. Barney contains none of it, so there is no usage profile to collect.
- Never sold, never used for advertising, and never used to train any AI model.
- Delete your account from inside the app at any time, and choose what happens to the record you built together.
Privacy policy Terms of service Deleting your account Support
Where this is going
We are building towards a data cooperative, so that in time the communication data Barney depends on is governed by the people it came from rather than by a company. That work is underway and not finished, and we would rather say so plainly than imply it already exists.
Today Barney is run by Harness the Spark Ltd, and the privacy policy above says exactly what that means.